Silly Kid Quotes

These are some of my favorite kid quotes from my family  and students.

Spring 2006: “Momma, you’re getting more loving from me,” Pumpkin at age 4, in response to his second helping of my lasagna.

Fall 2006: As my second grade class was discussing heritage one of my students raised her hand to share her heritage. “You know those tiny green people?” she asked. “You mean leprechauns?” I responded. “Uh-huh! I’m one of those!” she exclaimed. I thought maybe she was confused about her Irish heritage, it turns out she was Lithuanian.

Spring 2007: I said to my 5-year-old Pumpkin, “We’re going to get to see Aunt Brandi this summer!” Pumpkin replies, “The one that lives in the computer?” I laughed and said, “Yes, the one who lives in the computer.” She actually lives in Scotland and we use iChat to voice with one another.

Spring 2008: Wisdom of a 7th grader, “Never admit it’s your arm pits that smell like onions.”

Fall 2009: Me: What book would you use to look up a synonym for the word “fierce?”, Student: A tyrannosaurus?, Me: Do you mean thesaurus?, Student: No, I mean a dictionary!, Me: Oh boy, we need to start back at the beginning…

Fall 2009: Student to Hubster: “Mr. D, your wife is cute!” Hubster: “It’s okay you said that the first three times, but don’t let me hear you say that again. It’s not appropriate to talk about your teachers in that manner.” Student: “I can’t help it, she IS!” Hubster: “I know, that’s one of the reasons I married her.” ♥ The joys of teaching at the same school!

Winter 2010: 5th grade boy, ”Do we have to use real numbers and letters on our math homework? Because I made up my own dragon language last night and did my homework in that!”

Winter 2010: I had a fifth grade student recite his paragraph while practicing his “accent” today. I had to have him repeat his paragraph without his accent so we could focus on the content and not the speaking. I asked him what type of accent he was using, he replied, “My accent!” He continued speaking in this accent all day, which sounded more like a Kling-On Pirate than anything I’ve ever hear.

Spring 2010: Two days before St. Patrick’s day, a student was wearing a green shirt with Ireland written across a shamrock. Me to student, “Why are you wearing that shirt today? You should save it for Wednesday.” Student: “Why, what’s Wednesday?” I take her over to the calendar and point out Wednesday,  St. Patrick’s Day. She says to me, “So? My shirts says ’IRELAND!’ That had NOTHING to do with St. Patrick’s Day!”

Spring 2010: 5th grade student, “Mrs. D, I’m going to be a pallbearer in my cousin’s wedding!”

Spring 2010: Random 5th grade story, “Once, I was in Alaska and got my hands stuck under a treadmill.” That was it, no other clarifications or details.

Summer 2010: Jokes by my nephew!
Nephew: Why did the pig cross the road?
Pumpkin: Why?
Nephew: …To get his pork chops!
Pumpkin: I don’t get it!

Nephew: Why did the monkey on a unicycle stop riding?
Pumpkin: I don’t know.
Nephew: C’mon this is an easy one, guess!
Pumpkin: I still don’t know
Nephew: To get a banana!

Fall 2010: 5th grade boy asks, “Mrs. D, Who attacked us on 9/11? The Japanese?” My response, “No, that was at Pearl Harbor.” Student looked at me with the most confused look and asked, “The Twin Towers are at Pearl Harbor?”

Winter 2011: 5th grade girl asks, “Mrs. D, if I eat my finger nails and the little pieces of skin next to my nails, am I a cannibal?”

Winter 2011: Me: “How can different forms of water be used?” 5th grade girl “You can build a small igloo to cook on the stove for a nice cool drink.” And we just read and discussed an informational piece on the phases of water.

I’ll add more quote as they happen…

What are some of the crazy kid quotes you’ve heard?